Snow in the South…

The first day of February greeted me with the majestic landscape covered in a thick blanket of untouched pure white snow. And then I threw the kids into it!

Snow in the South isn’t that common of a thing. It’s not like those scenes you see of Chicago, New York, or all of Colorado where people brace themselves against the driving winds as they are sandblasted with bits of ice that go by the name of snow. It’s not rock pellets that sting your eyes and slowly freeze them open. It’s not a scene where the heathen inhabitants are under the wrath of their local diety who is trying to wipe the slate clean and erase them from the face of the planet.

The Southern slow is a more easy going and gentle snow. It lasts about 3-4 hours, is usually just enough to cover the lawn so the kids can sled, closes all businesses and workplaces, except for the grocery stores where there is a mass onslaught of people buying up every crumb of bread, milk and butter they can lay their hands on! It’s pandemonium in the aisles and in the streets, but it’s fine sledding conditions everywhere else.

So what do you do when the schools are closed, work is closed and you are all home together? Get outside and make snowballs to throw at people of course! Throw some kids down a hill with a slick pastic disc strapped to their rear ends! Show off your building skills by making a snowman that is the envy of the neighborhood. Let the kids frolic and play with him in some of tribute to Frosty. Take hundreds of pictures to show the good times they’re having (so during their teenage years when they later claim they never did anything fun in life, you have the evidence). And then when everyone has gone back inside with frozen fingers and toes, you can work on your Jackie Chan moves and Ninja Kick the crap out of your creation. You can mouth some sort of cool dialog from your favorite macho movie as you put your boot upside Mr. Snowman’s head! You can wail on him with your Kung-Fu Grip of Death!

And when you’re done cracking his skull open and spilling his snowflake innards all over the lawn, you can tell the kids a band of hooligans came along and vandalized their new friend. You can let them know you did everything you could to protect him, but the band of roughs were too quick and before you could come to his aid, Frosty was a shattered wreck of a snowball. For dramatic effect, place your fist on your chest and swear that at the next snowfall you will build him again and will seek vengenace against anyone who dares come to close.

Or you could do what I did, which was take pictures of the snow coming down. You can see the short lived winter wonderland by clicking here.

The snowman assault scenario is not approved for children under 8 :)

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